Understanding Anxiety in Children with ADHD
What is Anxiety?
Anxiety is like that uninvited guest who shows up at the most inconvenient times—normal every now and then but exhausting when it overstays its welcome. For kids with ADHD, anxiety often comes as a package deal, making their challenges feel even bigger.
We all know that flutter of nerves before a big test or starting something new. But when anxiety moves in and makes everyday life feel overwhelming, it’s time to pay attention. Kids with ADHD are more likely to experience anxiety as a coexisting condition, which can amplify their struggles with focus, organization, and relationships.
Did you know? Anxiety disorders affect up to 31.9% of adolescents aged 13–18 in the U.S. (National Institute of Mental Health). Recognizing the signs and offering steady, compassionate support is key to helping your child thrive.
How Anxiety and ADHD Interact
ADHD and anxiety can create a tricky dynamic. ADHD often leads to forgetfulness, missed assignments, or impulsive behavior, which can result in feelings of frustration or worry. Over time, this worry can develop into anxiety as kids begin to fear making mistakes or being judged by others.
For example:
A child with ADHD might forget their homework (again) and start dreading going to school, worried their teacher will call them out.
They might feel overwhelmed in noisy environments or struggle with social interactions, leaving them anxious about parties, recess, or even family gatherings.
It’s not just about the challenges—they may begin doubting themselves, thinking, “What’s wrong with me?” This is why helping your child understand both ADHD and anxiety is crucial for building self-compassion and confidence.
Signs and Symptoms of Anxiety in Kids with ADHD
Anxiety in kids with ADHD can show up in ways that might feel familiar but more intense. Keep an eye out for these emotional, physical, and behavioral clues:
Emotional Signs:
Restlessness or feeling “on edge”
Irritability or mood swings
Difficulty concentrating
Physical Signs:
Stomachaches or headaches
Rapid heartbeat
Fatigue
Behavioral Clues:
Avoiding school, homework, or social activities
Complaining frequently of physical ailments
Isolating from friends and family
Imagine this: Your child has been complaining of stomachaches every morning before school. Homework time ends in tears or arguments, and they seem to shy away from birthday parties or playdates they used to love. If this resonates, anxiety may be playing a bigger role in their day-to-day struggles. Use this free anxiety screener to help both you and your child better understand the level of anxiety they may be experiencing.
Watch this free training for my 3 step framework on how to move your child from struggling to thriving!
2. Empower your child with coping strategies
About 50% of children with ADHD also have a coexisting anxiety disorder. (Source: Child Mind Institute). Teaching your child coping strategies when they are young can be a game changer in helping them to learn how to manage anxiety early on.
Teach Your ADHD Child Coping Strategies
There are several simple techniques you can teach your ADHD child to help them manage anxiety in the moment:
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Education: One of my favorite children’s books I use to teach kids about anxiety is “Wilma Jean and the Worry Machine”. This fun and humorous book teaches kids about worry and anxiety in an engaging and age-appropriate way.
Mindfulness techniques: Encourage your teen to try breathing exercises or mindfulness apps, which can help calm their mind when they’re feeling overwhelmed. The most popular tool for anxiety in my office is called the ONO Roller. Learn more about it here.
Grounding Exercises: Simple yet effective techniques like counting backward or naming five things your teen can see, hear, or touch can help them regain control during moments of anxiety. These strategies shift their focus from anxious thoughts to the present moment, helping them feel more centered. For a comprehensive guide on grounding exercises, the University of Virginia provides an excellent resource, which you can download here. Additionally, TherapistAid offers more grounding techniques that are great for kids and teens. You can explore that resource here.
Healthy routines: Developing healthy sleep habits, eating a balanced diet, and getting regular exercise can also help regulate anxiety levels. Check out my free Daily Dose Guide that can help your teen incorperate healthy routines and habits to help manage anxiety and improve mood.
3. How Parents Can Help Manage Anxiety
When to Seek Professional Help
While I truly believe that there is no substitute for loving and intentional parenting in helping children and teens with ADHD develop good mental health, sometimes it’s not enough. If your teen experiences frequent panic attacks or is unable to handle day-to-day activities because of their anxiety, it may be time to seek professional help. Look for signs like:
Persistent feelings of dread or worry that don’t seem to improve
Panic attacks or inability to cope with normal daily routines
Avoidance of school or social activities for extended periods
Professional interventions such as counseling or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can be very effective in treating anxiety in ADHD children.
Unfortunately, 80% of children/teens with anxiety don’t receive the care they need (Child Mind Institute), making it even more important to recognize when additional support is necessary.
Supporting Your Child Through Therapy and Professional Support
Your role as a parent doesn’t end when your child starts therapy. While therapy sessions offer valuable support, the real progress often happens at home between those appointments. The children and teens I work with typically show the most improvement when their parents actively reinforce anxiety management techniques consistently at home and show up as a non-anxious presence in their teen's life. However, many parents feel overwhelmed and unsure of how to support their child in a way that’s both effective and nurturing.
If you’re looking to strengthen your parenting skills and better support your ADHD child in managing their anxiety, check out my free training! In this training, you will learn the 3 steps to moving your ADHD child from struggling to thriving.
If you are ready to dive deeper into helping your child, my group coaching program might be just the ticket. Click here to schedule a no-obligation consultation call to discuss if my signature group coaching program is right for you and your child.
